Staring into the Reflecting Pool

Susan and I had decided that we would go hit these two places on Hwy. 380 -- so off we went. We went to this rustic furniture outlet so I could look at barstools. Susan ends up buying a very expensive but beeeeeautiful sofa for "my" living room. She is now officially ready for me to get out. We also went to the rustic furniture place on Main street. She bought a bench there. Got a good deal on it. It was funny--went out to look at barstools. I came back with nothing. She dropped a wad of cash. :) OH! We also went to Frisco's new Farmer's Market that the Lion's Club puts on. We bought produce and fish for a good Sunday dinner. Also, fresh dog treats. Ol' Maggie is the brand. Emily loves-loves them. I love-love my Emily.

The reflection has begun. I'd put off thinking about this whole surgery thing until I knew I was approved. Life can disappoint--you understand. This afternoon, I watched this chick's vlogs (those are video blogs. that wasn't a typo) on Utube. It was 10 months of her going through the process. She is now only 10-15 pounds overweight and was talking about all these issues that I remember from when I'd just gotten thin the first time in my life--after Medifast. You see fat chicks and want them to somehow know you are one of them--that you understand. You no longer stick out in a crowd as the fat chick. You're another regular girl so you've lost a bit of your identity and are a bit lost. You can eat in public without feeling as if everyone is disgusted that you're eating. You're just a girl eating. I was regular size for enough years that the other weird things I don't think will come back--the anxiety about being attractive and the change in my personality. As this girl was discussing what she was feeling, I started to cry. I'm remembering that there is much more to a radical weight loss than fitting in cute clothes. You have to find a way to fit your brain into your new cute body and identity.

I went into Susan's room. She was getting ready for a birthday dinner. There I am crying and I say that I am getting upset. We talked about it and I think I'm going to have to see one of my very expensive and educated professional friends through this. I've heard there is some post-surgery depression because you've done something so radical to your life. Isn't it weird that doing something that makes positive change in virtually every part of your life can be so scary? It amazes me how complex we are. It should be simple: you're fat-get skinny-be happy.

What it all boils down to is that I want to be healthy. I've never in my life thought or said that until now. I guess because for the first time in my life I am unhealthy. So, I'm looking at the "hotness that I will become" as a bonus. If you want to check out the chick I watched on Utube this afternoon, her videos are here: http://www.youtube.com/user/thebandinme

Tonight's dinner: chicken pasta with breadsticks. Gonna be a lot of bread in the diet because there's none after they tag me. No tortillas either. I can't face that one yet. I'm going to have to pretend that I have an allergy. I guess foods that make you pucky (You may not know, but I like to call puke pucky) would count as that. That's a nasty allergic reaction I'd say. Might have to have a funeral for all the favorite breads I can't have. I smell a party theme! PERFECT.

Cleared for Take Off!

And I'm talking about taking off weight! The call
came today that I am approved for the lap band surgery. They didn't make me jump through hoops at all! My maximum out of pocket would be $6000, but the lady told me it would probably be around $3000. My appointment to map it all out is on the 16th. My last day at work is the 13th, and then I'll go home and be with Daddy for father's day. I told the lady who phoned that right now I'm spending several thousand moving so money is tight. She thinks Dr. Fox will be okay with me putting maybe $1500 down and going from there. I'm so glad, otherwise it will be August before I have it. I still have the washer and dryer to buy and the moving expenses. When it rains good stuff, it pours!

If you're at work, put on the headphones.

I was going to post this on my list of websites under my pic, but was afraid y'all would miss it. This was filmed by one of those kids you'd hate to have in class, but would really love the kid being there because he's so funny. Watch and you'll understand. Obviously, the mom is a hippie. Her kids drop F bombs on her. Only hippie mothers would allow this. Anyway--enjoy. http://www.guzer.com/videos/sister-busted-by-brother.php

This just can't be!

Bill Murray's wife is leaving him because he drinks too much, smokes pot and goes abroad to have crazy, sexy time with other people. BUT IT'S BILL MURRAY, BITCH! Somebody slap her. I love him as much as I do Robert Downey Jr. These are crushes from when I was in high school and they stick more that way. I realize he is old, but I still love him. I wish he was on David Letterman every night. After some research, I discovered that there was a prenup but she is going to get $7 million when they divorce. Now I understand. A stoned, drunk, cheating, absent man can't compete with $7 million.

Mobaganda, brother!

Sounds like a new country in Africa, doesn't it? (I hate Africa. Long story.) Anyway, www.mobaganda.com is the easiest way to invite people to an event and have them RSVP. WAY easier than Evites. I spend all day picking out backgrounds on Evite and really, I have better things to do. (Kinda) So, this mobaganda just launched today. There are only two format options: cute or cool. You RSVP right there and all is done. Check out this fake one I made
http://mobaganda.com/sarashousewarmingparty When I do have a real housewarming party, I'm using this. I'm cool like that.

Side note--if you read Cindy's comment about the beverage better than the Sassy Sara, she found the peach bitters. Focus and determination, friends. Admirable.

Worthy of Considering

This guy on the dating site today writes me that he wants to be my slave. No kidding. He is all muscles and wants a big girl to boss him around. I'm considering it because of the move coming up and all. Who couldn't use a man around the house? He could walk the dog for me too. And I'd make him be quiet--he'd like that 'cause it's mean and bossy. Any thoughts on that?

Sassy Sara Martini

Tillman's Roadhouse restaurant has it and here is the recipe--
SASSY SARA
1 ounce (2 tablespoons) Absolut vanilla vodka
1 ounce (2 tablespoons) pineapple rum
½ ounce (1 tablespoon) fresh lime juice (see note)
½ ounce (1 tablespoon) fresh lemon juice (see note)
1 ounce (2 tablespoons) simple syrup
2 slices red jalapeño pepper
Combine all ingredients and shake with ice. Strain into a chilled martini glass. Garnish with small slices of red jalapeño. Makes 1 serving. Sounds yummy!

Cindy and Alissa went on Friday. I declined because, as Cindy puts it, I'm being "conservative". You know for me to miss an excellent meal, conservative is an understatement. Anyway, they said it was good. I'd probably still like my margaritas better, but I'm open to trying a few to determine that.

Back to Work

Let the countdown begin! I have 14 more days of work until summer. Yea summer! As you know, I am a hot blooded woman. Without moving cool air, I become agitated and unhappy. I don't think the air conditioner in Susan's house is working properly. It's hotter than usual. I can't make a move without a fan on me. I am leaving her house with 4 fans I did not own when I moved in there. 3 of which are large oscillating fans. You may think that it's because I'm fat. It's not. I was this way when I was skinny.

Speaking of a skinny Sara--I hope I hear about the surgery this week. Say a little prayer for that. Then say another one about $6,000 dropping into my bank account to finance it. It might make me poor, but I'd be looking great!

Tonight, I do a new student chat with Lamar. I'll have to miss Kaitlin's end of the year orchestra concert. Susan's parents are coming up for it. I think it's only an hour and it's only for the brand new to the program students. My fear is that I'm going to be asked something I can't answer. I've prepared a pat answer for that, of course.

There's a new book I want written by Chelsea Handler, a comedianne I like. The book is titled, "Are you there vodka, it's me Chelsea." A play on the old Judy Blume book, "Are you there God, it's me Margaret." I wish I'd thought of that title. I think it's perfection.

If you've not already checked out the video "Did you Know?" do. I've linked to it beneath my picture. The one with the green bird on my head, as mother says.

Never slept so much in my life...

Thursday night, due to excitement from the move, I couldn't sleep. I took a zambian. Those are the non addictive pills that reunite you with the beaver and Abe Lincoln from your dreams. You're familiar, no doubt. I slept until 1:45 the next day. At 3:00 pm, I took a nap. So...they work and stuff. That night, I say to Susan that I'm not sure I'm going to be able to sleep. She gives me some of her new bronchitis wicked cough syrup. I was able to sleep and took another nap. So...cough syrup works too. I've spent my Memorial Day weekend not roasting hot dogs, but sleeping like an old person in the old folks home.

Saturday I did buy a nice bed to go with the new headboard. I took advantage of Sleep Experts mismatch sale. It's a pillow top bed but the pillow top is foam. I loved it. JB will take me in his truck to get it in the next two weeks. It's reason #403 I'm excited about moving into my own place. When I'm going ot sleep at night, I try so hard to rmeember everything I have in storage that I'll be decorating with or using. It's going to be like Christmas.

All I need/want now is a washer and dryer and this small leather chair that either $200 or $300, I can't remember. I'm going to put my big black chair in my bedroom since it's going to be all black and white. Small stuff is bathroom stuff for guest bath and bedding for guest bedroom. God Bless IKEA. I'm glad I have time to get it all and save money for the movers and move in fees.